Thursday, December 10, 2015

"Jim Dandy To the Rescue" repurposed as "Dick Cheney to the Rescue": A peek into the former vice president's mind



So statesmanlike of the former Vice President to distance himself from a candidate's proposal to bar Muslims from the US. Here's a version of the Jim-dandy thoughts that might be running through his head.
Posted by Jay Harvey on Thursday, December 10, 2015
Dick Cheney to the Rescue


The GOP’s next POTUS also gotta be controlled:
Being just vice president soon gets old.
So when the Donald says to keep all Muslims out,
It makes me grow a conscience, it makes me wanna shout:

Dick Cheney to the rescue —
Go, Dick Cheney, go!

And no one better tell me that I just don’t care:
Let the good Muslims enter, kill the others over there.
My heart’s in the right place, thanks to my surgeons:
We’ll deprive the would-be martyrs of a hundred thousand virgins!

[Chorus]
Dick Cheney to the rescue,
Dick Cheney to the rescue
Dick Cheney to the rescue,
Go, Dick Cheney, go!


Our invasion of Iraq, when Saddam Hussein was hurtin’
Was awesome for our country, and so good for Halliburton.
I have two / firm / rules: Pretend to love the human race
And when huntin’ with a friend, try not to shoot him in the face.


[Chorus]

My mouth twists when I smile like it’s been hit with a brick;
No matter what else happens, I will always be a Dick:
I suggested to Pat Leahy that he stick his in his rump,
Now everyone’s amazed I’ve got more class than Donald Trump!


[Chorus]